Nobody Wants to Touch Me

Just got back from my endocrinologist appointment. Luckily, my enchanting goiter has no cancer cells - but it has no thyroid cells, either. A huge cyst filled with gooey stuff, encasing my thyroid. But, this lovely goiter has pushed my trachea over an inch to the right. Because of this, the cardiac surgeon I was assigned, by Medicaid, won't replace my heart's aorta (with Dacron) until the trachea is moved back into place, so the ventilator can be inserted during the operation, without complications.

Now I learn that it is unlikely the ear, nose and throat surgeon will operate on my goiter until the heart is repaired. Because, it might erupt if my blood pressure rises during surgery. Endocrinologist said it was the second largest goiter she has ever seen. Perhaps I should name it. What do you think of the name, 'Gilbert'? Gilbert Goiter.

The doctors are consulting with each other. I can imagine the conversation:

"I'm not gonna touch her until you do".
"Uh no. You gotta go first - I am not going to take responsibility for this"
"Fuck that! I don't want to get sued"
And so on, and so on.

I feel like the last kid picked for dodge ball.