Stealthy Normalcy

I am now back online, thanks to a little cigarette-lighter-sized device from my phone company that plugs into my computer. I notice that my entire mood has changed, since I am able to once again scroll through Facebook and listen to music and check my email several times a day. I feel hopeful and happy again. I have come to depend on the community I've developed via these bits and bytes. I look forward to the new photos of adorable animals and left-wing political statements from folks I know and also from those I've never met. New and old music via You Tube and other services soothes my soul and provides inspiration. Even though I am still mostly isolated here at mother's house, I feel like I'm part of the larger world again. Without actual human contact, I am starting to feel alive again!

Mother does not know I have the Internet back. It might throw her into a rage And, even though she does not have to pay for it, she will not be happy that I am footing the bill and I can expect a series of lectures about my "financial foolishness". So, I must keep this form of global connection secret from her, until the time is right. But, I am feeling free again!

Still no job or steady income, but I say my daily affirmations "I am open to abundance, money easily flows to me" and "all my needs are taken care of before I even ask - I am safe" daily. Also, "I have a comfortable, reliable, fuel-efficient vehicle". Still no form of transportation to call my own. But, I have been starting to ride a bicycle agian (after decades) - beginning very slowly and gingerly. Need to take it easy, for my back. But, it might provide me with a way to the land of the living. Slowly working on this. Plus, balancing on 2 wheels is strengthening my back and core muscles. And, my lungs feel stronger, too. Believe me, I am sick and tired of being flat on the floor and in pain!

So nice to feel hopeful again! God bless the Internet!

But, I must remember to be gentle with myself.