I AM a Singer - Just not a Pop Singer

Another Rockaroke revelation last night.

I think I got the need to sing old cover tunes out of my system last night. I really haven't kept up with pop music. Don't listen to the radio anymore, as it has become UNLISTENABLE due to all of the commercials and promos etc.

So, when I sing on Sunday nights, I do songs that I either sang or liked, from the '70's and '80's. Last night, I felt all of the stage fright and anxiousness disappear. A good thing, for sure. I know I had to work through all of that fear, after being away from performing for so long. I decided to sing The Pet Shop Boys' "West End Girls" and it was kind of fun. BUT then I started getting bored - on stage. Doing the song "just like the record" held no interest for me. I remember feeling this way in 1987, during the end of my stint in the Harrisburg, PA Top-40 cover band, Webz.

While there is joy in live performance and in the interaction with musicians - and it IS communication, it is simply not enough for me. I need the communication of constant innovation and the thrill of improvisation in order to fully connect with music. Minds and souls merging and mingling in new and exciting ways keeps the music alive for me. Maybe this is why I have a problem with Western Classical music. Perhaps this is why I have no interest in singing with a choir. I can appreciate it. I can find bliss while listening to it. But I am bored with performing it. Perfecting somebody else's music is not interesting to me.

Jazz is different. There is a structure, a framework from which improvisation takes place. Turns out Indian Classical music works in the same way. There is a basic melodic structure, and then, the individuality of the performers takes over.

To me, performing "in the moment" means being ALIVE. Free improvisational music, while a challenge to hear, is the MOST fun to perform. Psychic musical communication is hard at work - there is a lot of listening and interaction. Like sex, with music. And sometimes a whole lot more satisfying than physical communication.

So, it is OK that I don't wail with the best of them at Rockaroke. I am an improvisational singer and not a pop singer.