This is What Anxiety Feels Like

First, there is an electric pulsing throughout my body. Then, a slight shaking that continues. My breath becomes shallow and I fight through a sinking feeling in my stomach. Next, My brain feels like it is crowded by too much information. Every sound I hear is dramatically amplified - any kind of noise is too much. I work my hardest to banish negative words from my mind. The shaking gets worse - the tremors don't seem to be visible to anybody else in the room. My face is nearly immobile, as I struggle to keep my composure. I run to my room and I stiffly lie on my bed for a while. Then, the fight-or-flight urge kicks in and all I want to do is run away from my surroundings. I concentrate on my breath and my hands start to tremble. I want to cry but don't know why. It feels like the end of the world is coming, but I know it isn't. So many days start out like this. I struggle and try not to take any medicine. But then, after an hour or so of this torture, I break down and put half of an anti-anxiety pill under my tongue. I start to calm down. I feel a little ashamed for having to take the medicine. I tell myself to be grateful to have relief from the panic.