All I Need is the Air That I Breathe

This is the best photo taken of me in a long, long time. There's a reason for that.

Sure the haircut is great and I am so happy that somebody finally gave me bangs, again. Stylists have been telling me for years that my wavy locks and my "very strong part and cowlick" would make bangs impossible and they refused to cut them! Also, my eyebrows were darkened - I didn't ask for it but the beautician was bored and I said, "sure, what the heck."

But, the main reason I look so good is that I had just completed a session of oxygen therapy. I wish they had taken a photo of me when I walked in the door. My complexion was ghostly pale and I had giant circles under my eyes. I've made no secret, in this blog, that I suffer from depression and anxiety. Since I've moved to such a high elevation, 7,000 feet, my anxiety has worsened and I get bad panic attacks from time to time. I was in the throes of an attack this morning, when I decided to breathe in some 02 for a half an hour.

In my initial session with my latest doctor, he pondered my heart condition and weakened lungs (from the pulmonary embolism of 2011) and told me that recent research showed heart patients had a much greater risk of depression than those with healthy hearts. Doctors are beginning to wonder if a lack of oxygen is making life more difficult for us. This is my second oxygen session (still a bit expensive for me), and I can tell you that after the first session, my anxiety was much less for several days. But this morning was agony.

I have been exercising (going for hour-long morning walks) but clearly it isn't helping me, and I frequently have to take a short nap upon my return. Not enough air is getting into my lungs. I hope oxygen therapy won't be considered too experimental and that I'll be able to get a prescription for it so that I can continue to feel better!